Thursday, July 19, 2007

Why Johnny MIght Not be Able to Read...

More entertaining tidbits from the pre-pre-pre campaign trail: Presidential Wannabe Barak Obama wants to start sex-ed for kindergarteners, saying providing age-appropriate sex education, science-based sex education in schools is "the right thing to do."

Two questions, Mr. Obamarama—what is age appropriate for kindergarten kids within the context of sex education? And what about leaving that to parents to address with their kids, and let’s devote school time to learning the alphabet and how to read and cipher math.

Here are two possible samples from the Barak Obama Kindergarten Sex-ed Primer:

Use the alphabet to explain the differences between males and females, where XX plus Xy = XY. Or another XX.
Can you get a YY?
Why YY?

What about X’s and O’s?
What is xoxoxo?

Wait until the First Grade.

Use math to demonstrate where babies come from (which is one of the most fundamental queries on the minds of all kindergartners, I’m sure):

One plus One equals Three, except when One and One both have onesies, in which case it takes a team of lawyers to adopt a kid by a gay couple.
Maybe it takes a Village.
Or maybe the Obama's Sex-ed-arama is not such a hot idea.

Senator, you’re way off in the tall weeds from the campaign trail.
Get out of our homes and out of our classrooms, and back on track.

Tell me what you’re going to do to formulate a plausible energy policy, protect America’s borders from people who want to kill us in the name of Allah, and what you can do to make sure we don’t evolve into a nation of broke senior citizens by the year 2045.

We’ll take care of telling Susie and Johnny where their siblings came from, and what is appropriate behavior for 5 and 6 year olds playing together.
Now, go play nice with the other candidates.

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