Mergers and Acquisitions

Witnessed some old-fashioned M&A activity on Friday in Dallas, as Vince Rowe got good and married.

When the bride, the former Dr. Susan Kohl, had trouble placing her ring on his finger, the preacher cracked, “Don’t worry, Vince, it won’t cut off your circulation. It just takes you out of circulation.”


Point of clarification, Dr. Rowe is still a doctor.

Between Vince and Susan, there are 7-kids in the newly-blended Rowe household. Ray Whitworth, one of our Dallas affiliate’s show producers quipped, “with seven you get Vince Rowe.” There were other “quips,” too, but this is a family blog.

Security was tight for the Rowe ceremony, held high above Dallas in the Reunion Tower. They wanted to make sure Vince stayed up there until the bridal party arrived.

You may recall from last week's shows, Vince was struggling to memorize his vows. Said they reminded him of War and Peace.

I'm not sure if that was a criticism of the length of the vows or the content.

We have from the notebook of another BizRadio Network Producer in attendance, Mike Shannon, the entire text of the fabled and controversial vows over which Vince was laboring last week:

"I, Vince Rowe, of the Online Trading Academy at o-t-a-attend.com, take you, Ms. Kohl, to be my next lawfully-bedded wife, to stop-gap and to hold, from this market closing date forward, for better or for worse, for rich or richer (using MY money,) in sickness and in wealth, regardless of our debt-to-equity ratio, to not engage in active (spouse) trading, to share in dividends and losses, to outperform or under-perform, to love and cherish each others' portfolios 'til debt do us part, or until some red light - green light black box solution comes between us. With this bling, I thee wed.*”

*And then the preacher stepped forward and added,

“Although such statements are based on Vince's current estimates and expectations, and currently available competitive, financial and economic data, these forward-looking statements are inherently uncertain. He, therefore, cautions the potential wife that there are a variety of factors that could cause business conditions and marriage results to differ materially from what is contained in his forward-looking statements.”

Mike and Ray are also the BizRadio Network travel and logistics planners, and worked out a fairly romantic honeymoon itinerary for the newlyweds. Looks like it’s going to be a fun-filled week:

Monday
Visit Fort Knox, Lunch at Jack Benny's vault, Dinner with Alan Greenspan

Tuesday
Play Monopoly with the Kids; Allow Susan Boardwalk and Park Place using High Interest mortgage rate

Wednesday
Visit The New York Stock Exchange, Lunch with the SEC Chairman, Autograph Dan's Book, dinner at Nasdaq, pay homage at the grave site of Thurston Howell III.

Thursday
Address World Trade Organization meeting, Keep appointment with Dr. Rowe for Physical examination, Buy Chuck E Cheese for the kids using my..."OUR" money.

Friday
Breakfast with Mike and Carol Brady at family conference. Lunch with Bill Gates, Meet Dick van Patten and the cast of "8 is Enough;" Set up rotating schedule for bathroom privileges between boys and girls.

Saturday
Cappuccino at "Standard and Pours;" Book Presdiential suite at the Federal Reserve, and invite buddies from old Army Ranger Unit for a "HOO-Rah" Bar-b-que;

Sunday
Attend services at Chase Manhattan Chapel, Baptize kids in coin fountain; treat kids to an armored- car ride with Brinks Security officials, Give Mrs. Rowe a subscription to Wall Street Journal; stay at the Econo-Lodge with free cable and watch "Take the Money and Run" with Woody Allen, and "Wallstreet" with Michael Douglas.

Pictured below are the contingent from The BizRadio Network, which couldn't decide whether to sit on the Groom's or the Bride's side of the aisle. So we hung out in the back, next to the pasta buffet. From left to right, Ray Whitworth, Mike Shannon, Vince Rowe, Your Favorite Blogger, and Matt Cox.