Stupid Pandering Stunts Exposed

I would like to thank my paper route delivery person for double-wrapping my newspaper this morning.

I know it must have been a mistake…but it was so nice to have a dry newspaper instead of the loaf of pulp that usually greets me on rainy mornings like today...

Our Stupid Pandering Stunt of the Week award goes to Home Depot and Ikea for their new hybrid-only parking spots, placed close to the front door of their stores…right alongside the obligatory handicapped and common expectant mother parking spots.

If I spent $30-thousand for a hybrid---you know, a brand-new car—no way am I going to park it next to a pregnant lady’s car. Do you know wide they’ve got to open their doors to egress the automobile? Can you say "door-dings" down the side of your new hybrid?

Ditto the notion of parking in the space adjacent to a handicapped driver’s car. Hmmm…nice groove left behind by an errant hand grip ring or arm rest.
No thanks.

And besides, there are benefits from parking your brand new hybrid hooptie at the edge of a crowded lot…like exercise from hiking up to the front door of the store, so you don't feel guilty grabbing a half-gallon of the newest Blue Bell flavor...


Hmmmm....Icecreammmm....